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Diary of a Prius (2): I wanna be Georgy Clooney’s hybrid
July 31, 2007

Thanks for reading my journal and showing me your sympathy. I really need it.

March 30, 2006
I am going to Tahoe! The drivers argued about whether I could make it up the hills on the way. Come on, Tahoe hills are nothing! Glad they have some wits about them; they decided to take me instead of their station wagon (so conservative and blah looking if you ask me). 2 kids, 2 suitcases, skis, food, I say, bring it on! But the dog, do they really have to bring the dog? It is a lot of unnecessary fur on my upholstery. I would not complain so much if my driver actually cleaned me every so often.

They chatted with each other about how it was so unexpected that I made it up the hills without breaking a sweat. Idiots. I could have told them. Even on a mostly uphill journey, I can average 35 miles a gallon – better than their other car on flat roads. And my continuously variable transmission eliminates the jerky gear shifts that most other cars inflict on their passengers.

March 31, 2006
My driver has no idea how to drive on the snow. Luckily I have anti-lock brakes and traction control, or else I would already be lying in a ditch somewhere on the side of the road.

April 5, 2006
Now that I am caked in mud and road salt from the trip to Tahoe, my driver finally decided to take me to a car wash – the first since I got to this house. I am really looking forward to that.

July 30, 2006
My driver showed me off to a bunch of her friends. She had the audacity to tell them how much she loved me! All I can say is, if she truly loves me she has a strange way of showing it. She went on about how much she liked my keyless entry, tight turning radius, and high visibility. But talk is cheap, and I’m still filled with trash.

November 28, 2006
It took her two weeks to realize that one of my tires was nearly flat! Don’t they teach you to check these things in driver’s ed? Maybe she needs to read my owner’s manual for once. Thank goodness her husband convinced her to check the tire pressure and put in more air. Now I am back up to 48 mpg. Of course, I could easily exceed 50 mpg if she would just learn how to drive smoothly.

Feb 12, 2007
Okay, I am 12,600 miles old. When is this woman going to take me in for my regular maintenance (I’m supposed to get it every 5,000 miles)? I have given up on being kept clean, but at least she can keep me healthy.

April 5, 2007
Finally she took me in to the shop. The mechanic said, “are you here for 10k or 15k?” She sheepishly said, “Um, 10k.” I almost screamed when the mechanic told her that it was no problem because cars like me are so reliable. Great, now she probably won’t take me in for another check-up until I am 50,000 miles old. Sigh.

June 17, 2007
I hear loads of Hollywood celebrities are driving hybrids these days. Why can’t I belong to Gorge Clooney or Cameron Diaz? They go to red carpet events and you just know they would make sure I looked smashing inside and out. Just my lousy fate.

July 18, 2007
It rained today, apparently a rare occurrence this time of year. What’s up with the weather? Global warming? I have to count it as a car wash, since I don’t get washed any other way. I have been reliably serving my neglectful owner and her messy kids for nearly two years now, toiling away in anonymity.

Please, someone, save me. Georgy? Cameron? How about Matt Damon? Click & Clack brothers?

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